I'll Take Looking For Adventure For $150 Please Alex...

Well it would appear that my 3 readers are upset I have not been writing as much as I have been posting funny pictures from the web. I must remind you, this is an experiment, kind of like a beta program, testing the system to see what works and what doesn’t. Sometimes, sadly, I don’t work. Writing is harder than it appears. Writing something relevant, well that is downright impossible at times.

Now I have thought about a daily blog where I just write random observations on life and my day. I think not only would that be mind numbingly boring, but asking allot of a person whose life is mind numbingly boring to begin with.

Recently I was invited to participate in an online survey, compensated of course. I don’t do much for free. They provided me with a webcam, the first webcam I have ever had. I had to answer 14 questions using said webcam and for this I would be paid $150.

The survey’s focus was on Jeep brand SUVs. Easy enough. I set up my brand spanking new webcam and began the survey. The first question was my opinion of Jeep. Eh. Ok, it’s a semi boring SUV was my response. The second question asked about adventures. They wanted, in detail, what my greatest adventure was. The cogs in my brain started to whirl and twirl and all I got was dead air. I often think of my brain as a hard drive, filled with so much useless data and information that when it comes to storing or retrieving something really pertinent it fails and comes with a Microsoft error similar to “File not found.” In all honesty, I really think the whole damn thing crashed years ago and I am just getting read/write errors. Ever walk in a room and have no idea why you are there? Yup, your hard drive is crashing too so don’t laugh.

Anyway, I digress. Adventure. The only thing I came up with was our trip to Jamaica and Dunns River Falls, a 910 foot waterfall that you climb from the bottom up. Truly an adventure if ever there was one. Had a blast.

That brings me to question number 3, provide 2 examples of daily adventures in your life. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?? Are you kidding me? It took me 20 minutes to come up with the whole climbing the waterfall thing. As the Jeopardy theme played in my head, I tried as hard as I could to think of something or somethings that would qualify as a “daily adventure.” I started to recall Ellie from “Up” screaming “Adventure is out there!” Sadly, not in my life. After sitting banging my head on the desk, I submitted this great response, on camera for eternity, “I really cannot think of any everyday adventure(s).” FAIL!

A week after the survey ended I received an email from the company sponsoring said activity. Basically they were docking me $10 from the incentive because my life was/is so boring I could not answer the question.

Now I am happy to get $140 and a free webcam for basically talking to myself any day, but how sad is it that a person’s life is so tragically mundane that they get debited for it?

I’m thinking that maybe posting daily would end up reading something like this,

Woke up at 5:15am, again, after deciding that wearing the same black pants I have now worn for the last 5 years was a good choice, I went downstairs and feed Buster his cup of dog food and a cup of chopped carrots as I began making my espresso and cereal. Watched the morning news while starring at the giant clock in front of me hoping to realize that it was actually Saturday and I did not need to drive to work. Upon coming to terms that it was indeed Tuesday, I gave the dog his biscuit and proceeded out the door. The freeway, as always, was loaded with trucks and driven by people who no longer respect of care about others and my day in the smash up derby began. Driving like a complete robot, I avoided idiot after idiot chatting on their cell phone, combing her hair or texting while driving 20 mph under the speed limit. I awoke in my office and pondered just how the hell I got there. I really need to stop driving in my sleep. After about 6 hours of pure unmitigated torture, I got in the car and drove home to see my ever happy dog and begin tending to my farms on Facebook.

Are you suicidal yet? Geez, I know I am just writing that. Well there you go, another essay complete for this week. Adventure is out there, I just need to find more and appreciate the tiny ones I have.