Living in the State of Oblivion

Recently I moved to a new state. Oblivion. Not the mental condition, but really the state of Oblivion, like the state of California. Most people are oblivious of its location, but trust me, it exists.


The residents of Oblivion are a clueless group, as one would expect. They go about their day, without a care in world. Laws, rules and even standard etiquette and manners are a thing of the past here. No need for abiding by any previous modicums of tact or decorum. It is a wonderful place, just not for me.

As a child I was raised in a strict Italian, Catholic home. There were rules and conditions under which you followed and lived or, well, you wouldn’t live too long. My grandmother was very strict, and loving. But mostly strict. When I “acted up” she would smack me with the business end of her yard stick. People often wonder why she used a yard stick. The answer is simple, she was about 5’1” and I was faster than her and the yard stick, in her mind at least, gave her an advantage. Course this never went over too well as yard sticks are not very strong and usually it would split upon smacking my young butt or wherever she managed to land a hit. But I digress. Rules. The house I lived in had rules. These very rules created a person who cared about others and what others thought of him. They created manners, the ability to say “Please” and “Thank you.” The same rules allowed me the talent to write a thank you note to someone, to hold the door for someone, or the elevator if I see someone running to catch the one I am in. Decorum, the ability to conduct oneself in an appropriate manner was taught to me as well. I learned one should keep their voice down when speaking inside a room with others. How you dressed was all part of decorum as well. I would check myself in the mirror prior to leaving for school or work, making sure my shirt was tucked in, my hair was neat, my ears were clean of potatoes (well that is what mom and the doctor called them), my pants were void of rips or tears or God forbid, holes. I always wore a belt to keep my pants from falling below my waist and my shoes were tied and clean.

Back to my new home in Oblivion. Here we have no rules, well we do but no one follows them or cares. Everyone here pretty much does as they please without regard to anyone else around. They talk on their cell phones with complete disregard for who is around them. No one uses “inside voices” here. Back in California we had a law passed that made talking on a cell phone without a hands free device illegal. That rule does not apply here. Just about everyone holds their phone to their ear while driving. I don’t. I find it much safer to follow the old law, but I am often looked upon oddly by the others.

The other day I was racing to catch the elevator to my office. The people on it saw me yet made no attempt to hold it for me. I managed to shove my arm through gap of the closing doors to open it. Content as I got in I heard an audible sigh from the other occupants. You see here people have forgotten how to be courteous and polite, and that is an acceptable way of life here. When entering a building I will hold the door for people and am rarely thanked or at the very least acknowledged. Again, civility is a foreign concept here.

The clothing people wear here would make my poor grandmother do back flips in her grave. I often wonder if people no longer have mirrors in their homes. I see people with their hair an abject disaster, as if they just woke, holes, rips, tears in their clothes, their pants falling below their waist exposing their underwear or worse. Shoes untied or wearing slippers or bedclothes. Large women with tops that expose their midriffs, a sight few of us really ever want to see.

I am not certain I will ever enjoy living in this state with these people. While I know I am an outcast, I will still send thank you notes to them when they do something unexpected or in the off chance they give me a gift. I will still be civil and use tact and decorum around them in the hopes that maybe one day, these old traits will come back into fashion here.